Active Listening... huh??
Have you heard of this concept of active listening?Its pretty cool - and its a skill that everyone could benefit from learning. Even if you're not directly in sales or some other job that requires listening.... oh wait - isn't listening a part of almost EVERY job???
You BET!!
SO - how does one listen actively? Surprisingly, its quite simple. Turn off ALL the thoughts in your mind, and concentrate solely on the person talking.
....wait a second... that doesn't sound like any kind of news flash!
Well... it isn't. That's the thing! It IS easy. Trouble is, its also difficult to actually DO. Let me tell you why.
See,for the most part, when someone is talking to us - particularly in a business setting, we're concerned about what we're going to say next, and how we can appear knowledgeable, or even clever. Trouble is, we tend to use the time when people are talking, to formulate these bon mots that we think will raise our stock in the conversation. And when we do that, we cease to ACTUALLY LISTEN to what's being said.
Question: how can we make an intelligent comment about something we've not actually heard?!?
Answer: you can't!
So try this out - actually LISTEN to what's being said. Then, once the person has finished speaking, indicate your understanding of what they just said, by paraphrasing it back to them in a precis (short format). This way, the person doing the speaking will feel respected and listened to - which, not surprisingly, makes your stock go up. THEN you can proceed to make an intelligent comment that actually has relevance to what was said!
Try it out. And don't be surprised if it feels strange - it will. Especially if you've made a habit out of jumping in with the "clever comment". Habits are tough to break, so just keep trying.
Just remember, its better to be relevant - so listen before you speak.
posted by Mark @ 6:27 PM
1 Comments:
I find that the primary reason it is difficult to perform active listening is because of ego. We are all so used to thinking about ourselves that we can't forget ourselves long enough to listen.
Perhaps the best step to take to begin active listening is to make a change of attitude and stop thinking about what I can get out of it, but about how I can serve people.
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